Ok holy crap I would not like to be in a room with this doll at night when it goes off and I would hate to be anywhere near it when it’s batteries start to die and it slows the laughter way down.
So walmart had brand new shopping carts today. That’s awesome. I also walked right up to an empty lane to pay. No waiting. Kick ass!
So today is boobquake. The media seem to be enjoying it. So remember wear something immodest.
Oh those religious wackos and their crazy reality denying ways. Always bending *Insert noun, verb, adj, event, news, opinion, color, lack of color, race, etc* to their will in order to better control preach their oppressive lovely world views. Pat Robertson is a recent example blaming the hati earthquake on their deal with the devil or whatever nonsense he was spewing out of that claptrap mouth of his. Now Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi is no exception either. Here is his goddamn stupid quote that’s going around the internet.
“Many women who do not dress modestly … lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes,”
Yeah right. Women wear less clothes and BAM more earthquakes. No. You sir are a dumbass. Unfortunately he’s not a big enough dumbass cause he can obviously still figure out how to exploit his dumbass followers into doing what he wants. “Oh noes you sheepeople have been BAAAAAD with your western clothes and boobies and free will and *gasp* enjoying yourselves. It’s the end of the world and boobies are the cause. Cover yourselves before it’s too late.” Look at this jerk demeaning woman and blaming any and all bad actions of men on the women. Finishing it up with a touch of world disaster. His fellow church buddies and him were probably giving high fives and slapping each other on the ass all day after that one.
Problem though is that pesky internet and the ablity of people like me and many many others who can make fun of him and point out that he’s wrong. Also, bless it the internet, the chance to organize a whole day devoted to showing as much of those earthquake causing boobies as possible. April 26th will be boobquake day where any and everyone blessed with such “lethal weapons of mass destruction” are encouraged to show what they’ve got in the name of science. That’s right everyone the idea is to shake and show those boobies to see if we can indeed cause an earthquake simply by wearing less clothes. So please girls do your thing in the name of science and let’s put this to the test.
Ah I like a good smack down of stupid claims. This one is a pretty good side by side of the 2012 garbage about the world ending. It lays out a few of the many unadvised claims about what will happen in 2012 and on the other side it shows actual information backed by evidence and facts. But you know don’t take my word for that or the chart’s either. Go look it up yourself, and if you go to any quack sites to find your information verify what they say.
Found via BadAstronomy.
Ah, South Africa. Land of my birth and family. Also the land of cars with flame throwers and various other theft deterrent devices. The new hotness now, ATMs equipped with pepper spray. If you start screwing with the ATM then it’s going to call the police and blast you with liquid pain. This can only end as well as the flame throwers on cars did. Hilarious. Not even before the article ends do I get a return on that prediction. Three workers doing maintenance on the ATM set it off.
I think this is funny but really it’s kinda a stupid idea. I mean you can easily cover or block the spray nozzle. Sure it would work the first couple times but people should wise up. Oh wait I forgot people are stupid so while some people would figure out that a simple sheet of plastic or whatever will stop it I’m sure there are going to be a ton of stories about how some retard with a stick got blasted into tears and puke.
I also think that it should be extended to blast people who take too long. Many a time I have wished that the ATM would just punch the moron holding up the line because they can’t figure out why they don’t have any money in their account.
Alright so I’ve briefly talked about miracle berries here and mentioned that I would throw a miracle berry party. Well I bought some and put together a little gathering at my house. The plan was for about 10 people myself included to show up at my house and drink and eat a bunch of sour stuff after using the berries. (I’m going to just keep on calling them berries even though they were the tablets you can buy off of think geek.)
I bought a bunch of stuff for this event and well out of the 10 people that I had thought of a few of them canceled a day before so I had some open slots, I invited two other people from work but it was on short notice and they couldn’t come. I understood I did tell them like the same day and they work late, but the other two people from work that I gave good notice for didn’t come citing excuses but I seem to hear that all the time. They suck, and the berries turned out to be awesome so it’s their loss.
Total turn out four people plus a baby. I really need to get some more reliable friends. But anyways.
Haha I saw this at Failblog and it rocks.
This looks like something either I, or my friend John would do.
HELLo I would like to take a moment to drop a bombsHELL on you. There happens to be a town in Texas that is HELLbent to do away with the HELLacious term of HELLo that is bringing on the HELLfire and unleasing the HELLhounds who chase down and drive everyone into the deepest HELLholes. And you might ask what on earth is wrong with HELLo? Well it’s because it has embedded within its’ cheerful greeting and innocent outlook is a HELLuva horrible evil word, HELL. That’s right for years we have been innocently greeting each other but little did we know that we are actually doing the DEVIL’s work. Sowing the seeds of evil in our brothers, sisters, coworkers, and even total strangers. In a nutsHELL, this has to stop. We must fight against the evil, force back the demons, send holy sHELLs of divine light and goodness to drive the HELLhounds back to unsHELL the evil that has been right in front of our very faces for so long. We must be HELLbent on destroying and removing this problem before it spreads even further. To replace tainted term we must use a word that is just as just as HELLo is evil, to this end the term HEAVEN-o has been coined. This new and good term is already being used the Courthouse, which we know is just an extension of the church. Where the divine word of God is processed into the Justice of Man. This my friends is just a small victory, we must proceed posthaste in order to get this to catch on in the rest of the country, and then THE WORLD!
Found Via Pharyngula. The main article can be found here.
